"There were times I’d lie to my mom to spend time with him, which made me feel a bit bad, yet free," she says. She had a “sheltered upbringing” and fell for someone adventurous. Norhanie Pangulima, a content ambassador at Hernorm, can relate. Cunningham adds, “If females don’t feel strong and independent, they might want someone like that in their lives.” How to Get Over a Breakup, According to Expertsĭr. Despite the fact that this quality makes him an unsuitable partner for the long-term, it can make him so attractive, it's seemingly worth the potential pain associated.” “A ‘good girl’ may admire the bad boy’s sense of freedom. If a girl's inner life is unexpressed, she may be drawn to a bad boy as a way of vicariously expressing her own inner rebel.”īasically, “We’re attracted to qualities in others that we ourselves wish we had,” says sociologist and clinical sexologist Sarah Melancon, Ph.D. “These traits are typically repressed during childhood, as females are socialized to be compliant and agreeable. “Girls possess a range of traits, like rebelliousness,” explains Robyn McKay, Ph.D., psychologist and co-author of Smart Girls in the 21st Century.
"So, on a conscious level, I think most women recognize that bad boys don’t make good long-term partners.” "Bad boys" free us from the pressure of being “good girls.” “In fact, they usually say they would actively avoid partners who are rude, disrespectful, or physically aggressive," she adds. That said, when asked what they’re looking for in an ideal partner, women tend to cite nice-guy traits, like honesty, trustworthiness, and respectfulness. “Men with very masculine traits may have better quality genes, so it could be attractive to women on an unconscious evolutionary level,” she notes. Fugère says research shows women are more attracted to masculine men during the middle of their menstrual cycle, when they’re most fertile. Science, in particular evolutionary biology, partially explains why bad boys can be so compelling. Apparently, we want their sperm - but not necessarily their partnership. And yet, sometimes we just can't quit them. Basically, they might be narcissistic (with a sense of entitlement and a grandiose view of themselves), Machiavellian (callous and prone to exploiting others), and psychopathic (displaying antisocial and impulsive behavior). In the most extreme and negative interpretation, bad guys display qualities of the so-called psychological dark triad, according to relationship researcher and coach Marisa T. What Is Avoidant Attachment in Relationships?